Understand Why Some Children Are Less Affectionate

Understand Why Some Children Are Less Affectionate

Some children are less caring and have difficulty giving and receiving affection, appearing to be a bit cold, because they develop a psychological defense, which can be caused by traumatic situations or difficult, such as being abandoned by their parents or suffer with domestic violence, for example.

This psychological defense is a disorder called Disorder Attachment Reactive, which often arises in the wake of ill-treatment or child abuse being more common in children who live in orphanages due to the bad relationship that has with their biological parents.

What is the disorder attachment reactive

Disorder Attachment, Reactive affects especially babies and children, upsetting the way they create bonds and relationships, children are carriers of this disease, cold, shy, anxious and emotionally desapegadas.


A child with a disorder of attachment reactive can’t be totally cured, but with the follow up right she can develop normally, establishing relationships of trust throughout his life.

Causes of Disorder Attachment Reactive

This disorder generally arises in childhood and can have various causes that include:

  • Ill-treatment or abuse during childhood;
  • Abandonment or loss of parents;
  • Behavior violent or hostile on the part of parents or caregivers.

This disorder arises especially when children under 5 years of age suffer some separation of the family, or if they are victims of maltreatment, abuse or neglect during childhood.

The main Symptoms and how to Identify

Some of the symptoms that may indicate the presence of this syndrome in children, adolescents or adults include:


  • Feeling of rejection and abandonment;
  • Poverty of affection, demonstrating the difficulty in showing affection;
  • Lack of empathy;
  • Insecurity and isolation;
  • Shyness and remoteness;
  • Aggressiveness in relation to each other and to the world;
  • Anxiety and tension.

When this disorder arises in the baby, it is common to drink cry, have a bad mood, avoid the affection of parents, like to stay alone or avoid eye contact. One of the first warning signs for parents is when the child does not differentiate between the mother or the father, and to the strangers, if there is no special affinity, as would be expected.

How is the Treatment

Disorder Attachment, Reactive and needs to be handled by a trained professional or qualified, as is the case with a psychiatrist or psychologist, who will help the child to create bonds with the family and the society.

In addition, it is very important that parents or persons responsible for the child receive training, counseling or therapy, so that they can learn to cope with the child and the situation.


In children who live in orphanages in the monitoring of the social workers can also assist in the understanding of this disorder and strategies so that it can be beaten, causing the child to be able to give and receive affection.

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